The Worst Art job I've ever had....

Ha! There have been some good ones!
Somewhere floating around Asia is a graphic novel on Albert Einstein I had to do in a single weekend for about the same pay as for three pages of art here.  Needed the money and they wired it right away, the script was constantly delayed until finally I had three days left to turn in a 64pg assignment.  There's a good reason I don't list it in my resume.

But that's not the lowest point.

Just a couple of years ago Veronica got contacted by a marketing company that was looking for three artists who could draw live while they did some market research just outside Boston.  I agreed to it thinking it might be fun and we convinced our good pal and amazing artist Ansis Purin to be the third.

I knew walking in that it was going to be bad.

They asked us to get there at some ungodly hour and when we walked in to the studio space they had rented we were regarded as being in the way and told to sit tight on some couches over to the far end of the room where we sat for a good 90 minutes while they set things up.  Why did we need to get there so early again?

The place eventually filled up with people, people who had been contacted to participate in the market study.  The product was a big secret up until the last possible second when it was revealed that this was a shoe company and some of the folks in attendance were high level executives of this shoe company.

The event was run by a guy named Fleming whose accent changed from English to Australian at any given time and I knew I was in for it when he had us all stand in a huge circle and say something we liked about the shoes we were wearing.

The circle included the artists, the regular folks and the executives.  I would have been a lot happier if I'd been asked to draw something rather than be involved inthe exercises, which we were told beforehand specifically we should not take part in.

Confusing no?

We don't want you to offer your insights into the questions we are going to present about shoes because you are not part of the market group, you are here to draw only, now get I the circle and tell us about your shoes!

Wha?

When it finally came time to draw it was of course during lunch.  The artists were split up into the three teams and lucky me I got picked by Fleming to draw for his group.

Each group worked up ad campaigns and or suggestions for products, like waterproof shoes that AREN'T butt ugly or sturdy shoes that don't look like they are made for an angry Subaru driver on their way to a bean protest.

We had about thirty seconds to draw images that went with the things they discussed using crayon and markers straight out of Mrs Mulligan's kindergarten class.

When the process involving art was over, we were not dismissed.  Instead we were told to join the discussion groups to offer our opinions about the projects the groups were now discussing.  Remember we were told NOT to do this by the same guy earlier in the day.

I was invaluable in discussing waterproof shoes since I walk from my garage to my car and back when it rains, so I don't own a pair and I wouldn't ever consider buying one.

The worst part was the regular folks who were there for marketing got paid $200 more than the artists who worked through their lunches and basically were treated like busboys.

It was certainly an experience but one I don't need to go through again.